Let's Talk About Out of Whack Time Based Expectations

24/7 expectation has created an individual, personal, en masse, chaotic world. It didn’t happen overnight but somewhere over the years we stopped, stopping. It used to be customary to stop, or to relax and pause. In many ways, pauses were automatically built into our day because the world moved much slower and we didn’t put so much pressure on time pressed productivity. The check really was in the mail and it took at least 4 days to get anywhere. There was an expectation of waiting. There was the understanding that everything took time. We weren’t so impatient and that alone gave us time to pause. Today, technology, excess choice and unrealistic expectations keep us in overdrive. And, the faster we move, the more distorted our perception of time becomes. We used to “stop to smell the flowers.” Now we "stop to smell the coffee", only while we drink it so we can get back to work or whatever we are doing to get more done.

In an absurd contradiction, technology has made our lives more complicated by making everything so convenient, accessible and fast. Email, instant messaging and social networking are the definition of a modern paradox. While fast and accessible, they are also some of the biggest time bandits we face today. There is little that sucks up time faster than constantly trying to empty the inbox. At the same time, social networking has turned six degrees of separation into one degree and has made everyone the star, writer, producer and director of their own reality show. It's also spawned a whole new way of doing business. It can be exhilarating and exhausting. One thing is for sure, it takes time and for so many, it takes priority.

Because the Internet is here all the time, it feels that the same is expected of us. This creates the pressure to respond and the stress to produce, in an instant. There is a cultural distortion that implies “if you don’t respond quickly, you don’t care . . . if you don't produce immediately, you're not on top of things.” I remember when it was expected that smart business proposals took time to construct, write and present (in the long lost method of "in person"). Now, we are sent a request for proposal, expected to see it the minute it hits the inbox and further, expected to drop everything else (also urgent, of course) to ensure it's immediate response (via email). Gone are realistic time based expectations and face to face communication. The new deadline is "due yesterday" and not only do we speak with our fingertips, but like everything else, they are always in motion.

There is so much more to say on this topic but I'll save it for later because I know that everything takes time; even reading the blog. This post just skims the surface of why we need to see a sea change. More later on how RELAX. SET. GO. will start the motion. Right now, just take a deep breath, relax and pause. Feels good even when things don't.

RELAX . . . Everyone has time to pause.

If you don’t believe me, take this simple test. Try to clear your mind and do only one thing: watch the clock for one minute. Did you make it? You may be surprised by how many people crave more time but struggle to stop everything. It’s hard to do and almost no one turns off completely. Many people become impatient as the seconds tick by, ironically, frustrated that time is not moving fast enough. Others go into what I call the “default mode” by keeping their mind in overdrive, thinking, thinking, thinking, so not to spare or waste a second in time.

It’s remarkable how long one minute can be when you are actually watching the clock and not racing against it. A minute is more time than you think. It is also enough time to make a difference in your day to day and ultimately, in your life. The beauty of taking time to relax and pause is that it doesn’t require time at the sacrifice of something else. Everyone can capture a minute or even more. And, oddly enough, by taking the time to pause, you can slow your emotional clock because pause brings perspective and perspective generally buys time.

"Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT'S relativity." - Albert Einstein

Time doesn’t discriminate but it is what you make it. The minute you start racing, the clock does too, or at least, your perception of it does. When you breathe and take things slowly, time is more likely to be on your side. It becomes the asset instead of the liability, and the asset can bring on remarkable change. That change will be inspired by how you SET your energy and narrative. When you tap into the simple secrets of RELAX. SET. GO. you will quickly find your personal best and attract the same in others. Oh yeah, and you’ll be ready to dream bigger and to achieve more than ever before.

If Silence is Golden, then Pause is Platinum

Time doesn't fly these days, it evaporates. Everyone craves it. No one has enough of it. It's the chorus emerging from today's 24/7 culture and it's at the forefront of why everyone is stressed out, overburdened and living life in overdrive.

I used to say, “My cup runneth over with stress. I can't take on one more thing, no matter how small.” I had a happy marriage with a beautiful kid, a high charged career, great friends and an active social life. I had everything but I had no peace in my life. I was always distracted and in many ways, I was falling apart from the stress of giving every minute of the day to someone or something else. I didn't know which moved faster -- my mind reciting an endless To Do list or me racing from one thing to another; constantly racing against the clock.

The pressure was always on but I realized it didn't have to be that way. That realization changed my life and it literally happened in a minute. It happened when I decided to reclaim my all but lost ability to pause. Consider this: everyone has time to pause. Even people who say they don't have time to breathe, do breathe and can pause. It's what you do with it that makes the difference.

RELAX. SET. GO. is a quick step program that turns a pause into perspective and a minute into magic that can last a lifetime. It will make you feel like Superman. It will make you feel greater peace and balance. It will make you happier and more successful. It will make you appreciate the little things and give you the confidence to go after the big things. It will make a difference. It made such a big difference for me and my family that I want to share it with everyone. It's easy and it works. So, are you ready to change your life? Get ready to RELAX. SET. GO.